Tag Archives: sex

Women and Monogamy…Do they go Hand and Hand?

Monogamy has always been a sticky subject for me. The idea of one person forever is downright scary, nauseating even. Surprisingly though, for the past 8 years, I’ve mostly been a serial monogamous–floating one relationship to the next, with a few random bed stumblings in between until I found my next partner in crime. But the chance of any of those PIC’s leading to marriage is what eventually causes me to end it. There’s something about the permanence feeling, the restriction, the death do us part bit–it’s overwhelming, it’s too much of a commitment; it’s possibly not for me.

But I’m not a man. I say that because these are all sayings I’ve heard come from a man’s mouth. Scientifically speaking, you expect that because men are supposed to go forth and spread their seed, they can’t be bogged down. We’re supposed to just catch it, grow it and hatch it with a man potentially by our side. However, when those hormones, brain fibers or whatever, were being formed in my brain, the incessant need to marry and procreate were not included. Instead, I too, want to go forth and spread my metaphorical seed–in all aspects of life that is.

As I’ve progressed into the second half of my twenties, I’m finding other women who feel the same. We watch the girls around us getting engaged, getting preggers, starting real lives with people and we just look on with horror with fake congratulatory smiles on our face. It isn’t because we are incapable of love. Many of us have it, but like man, we weren’t hardwired with these kinds of needs. We are no better nor worse than those who are, but one things for sure, our numbers are growing.

I think we’ve just progressed into a different sort of need. As the inequality gap closes in the workforce, women out number men as college graduates and newer, faster technology emerges, we’re just getting bored. It seems silly to say, but as we become more and more successful with easier ways to communicate, we need more to stimulate our senses. One person is good for now, but he won’t be indefinitely. Just like any job and the need for career growth,one needs personal and emotional growth. I think that can eventually tap out with one person and thus boredom ensues, making it hard for anyone person to stay truly monogamous.

My hope is that I’m wrong and all of us who’ve strayed from the norm can be proven wrong one day. But until then, while we falter, we’re just going to have to visit Adam and Eve and make sure we’re well stocked on toys. Because that’s one kind of monogamy we can all get down with.

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Are Pet Names a Good thing for a Relationship?

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Tip: Love or Sex ? Choose Sex…

Why do most women believe that their has to be emotion with sex?

Sex without emotion can be hotter and less inhibited.

Let a little passion drive your actions you might be surprised where it takes you.

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Building the Bridge to the Right Guy

I got to thinking this morning when I was sitting in Starbucks looking around at the beautiful, successful women that New York City has to offer the bachelors who walk these streets.

It’s really pretty simple.

It’s not 1975 anymore. Portraying yourself as a “Lady in Waiting,” as in waiting for your Prince Charming, is going to result in one thing: Being Lonely!

Nowadays, its all about being unique and different. What can you do to stand out from all of the other beautiful women that want that same good looking successful guy? The answer is in your behavior.  So, I put together a little checklist for the women who deserve the right guy.

1. Smile

2. Approach men

3. Introduce yourself

4. Start the conversation

5. Be fearless

Simple, yes. Effective, hell yes.

If a guy can’t handle a woman walking up to him and starting a conversation than he isn’t someone that you want to know anyway. A secure, good guy will be completely impressed by a women that takes the initiative and attempts to make love happen. So get out there with a purpose and a plan, smile at the next great looking guy you see and actually walk up to him and introduce yourself. You might be surprised at the outcome of your actions.

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Why You Attract The Wrong Men

Guess who’s fault that is? It’s yours! If you want to meet a certain type of man than you have to actually go to where he spends his time. It’s not rocket science. Stop being passive and lazy and just agreeing to go to all the same old, tired places that your girlfriends decide to go. Have a strategy and take control. Love can be serendipitous, but it won’t be on your time frame. Take action and make love happen. If your interested in finding out where the specific kind of guy hangs out just let me know.

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Taking Him from Lusting You to Loving You

Passion so intense the sheets are smoldering. He’s begging for more. You are in total control, pushing him, and you, into a state of ecstasy both of you have only dreamed.

Sex with your guy has always been great, but this time you rocked his world like no other woman on his notorious list of conquests ever has. As you reclaim your side of the bed, being the independent temptress of seduction that you are, the unthinkable happens: he follows you across the bed and wraps you into the most intense, I-will-love-you-forever spoon that you have ever experienced. As you feel his rock-hard abs melding into the small of your back, one last thought crosses your mind before you drift off to sleep, “GOT HIM.”

Have you ever been this woman? Well, let me tell you, I have been that guy and as soon as the sun came up, the sex kitten in my arms didn’t become the “love of my life,” she became “the lust of my life.” Contrary to what most women believe, giving a guy the best sex of his life does not get you any closer to his heart, but it can lead you to HIS TIPPING POINT, that critical time when a man’s sexual satisfaction opens the emotional pathway for him to fall in love.

If this window of opportunity isn’t handled correctly, it can actually keep you categorized as his woman below the belt. Believe it or not, guys do feel emotional attachment after sex, but they try to ignore and deny it.

The brief, pre-slumber moments after a man is completely sexually satisfied are filled with contemplation. “Maybe, just maybe, she could be the one.” And, he rationalizes by thinking about her ability to physically please him as well as her passionate living in the moment, sexual mentality. Many women, however, make the understandable mistake of showing their desire to emotionally connect after great sex. They become hyper-accommodating and absurdly attentive. Such after-sex behavior couldn’t be any worse if you’re in the market for more than just a romp in the bed. Why? Because when a woman changes from the seductive temptress to an emotionally needy marshmallow, his long-simmering fears of obligation, monogamy and commitment boil over. Mr. Right Now immediately extinguishes any thoughts of emotional attachment. But do not despair! You can conquer his tipping point and turn a commitment-phobic boy into a truly committed, fearless man.

First, great sex shouldn’t morph you into a doting girlfriend. Your mattress moves just rocked his world. Why turn around and tuck him in? If anything, let him wonder what you’re thinking as you both drift off to sleep. Then follow these four steps to transform him from lusting you to loving you.

Step One: After you show him your moves, move over. Retreat to the other side of the bed and do not make physical contact. Sleep soundly under a warm blanket of post-coital bliss.

Step Two: The morning after. Initiate another sexcapade. Please yourself, please him, and then get the hell out of there.

Step Three: Let him call you. I don’t care if it takes five days, let him reach out first.

Step Four: The next time that you are together, make sure the encounter does not include sex. Make him connect with you emotionally and don’t mention the great sex you had. He now knows what you can do in bed; show him what you can do outside the boudoir.

Engage the brain he has above his belt, find his tipping point, and your next night of lust will add the emotional element you’ve wanted all along.You Sex kitten you!!!

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Guys that text more than 3x without suggesting getting together aren’t serious about dating you!!!!

Look, when a guy is playing “Texting Tag” with you he is just feeding his ego from the attention he is getting from you. A real man wants to go from texting to seeing you in person as soon as possible.

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Men Ring in The New Year By Doing “Relationship House Cleaning” While Women “Do Relationship Fixing Uping”

When it comes to relationship status and the New Year, a guy would rather make a clean break and start over than put in the time to improve a subpar relationship, while women would rather make the effort to fix the relationship.

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Attention All Women: Learn to Compartmentalize

Today I was trying to convince my date coaching client to start compartmentalizing. Does anyone know what compartmentalizing means? It has nothing to do with organizing your clothes or making your tiny Manhattan apartment more livable. It is adopting the belief that you have the right to be sexually satisfied without having to be in love with the guy that you are are sleeping with! Read more »

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