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Ask Matt Titus:Is it too early to move in together?

Ask Matt Titus:Is it too early to move in together?

Dear Matt,

I am planning to move in with my boyfriend. We have been dating for about six months. Do you think this step will bring us closer together or could it be worse for the relationship?

Matt Titus says:

This is a big step in a relationship, and it’s not just about finding a great apartment and buying some cool items at Bed, Bath & Beyond to fix it up. There are some key matters you should be sorting through to make sure you’re not boxing up your things six months down the road.

  • First, he needs to know that YOU consider this a big step in the relationship. Do not let him think you are willing to just be his “roommate.”
  •  Second, it is important to let him know where you stand; but you should not have to ask him where HE is in the relationship. If this man wants to spend his life with you, he needs to be sure HE is ready for this next “move.”
  • Finally, make certain you are comfortable with his level of commitment, before you hire a U-Haul and sign any 2-year lease.

 

And, if you have a question, ask Matt: http://www.matttitus.com/contact/
Follow Matt On Twitter: @MattTitus

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Ask Matt Titus: All we do is fight! How can we reconnect?

Ask Matt Titus: All we do is fight! How can we reconnect?

Dear Matt,

 I had the perfect relationship for six months. My boyfriend and I loved to do everything together, but it seems lately that all we do is fight. Can you tell me how to reconnect?

 

Matt Titus Says:

  • Don’t be so available. No discussions just do it. Actions are always more powerful than words. If he doesn’t seem to notice your resentment, then it may be time to think about moving on. If he becomes concerned then, let him chase you for a while.

 

  • Tell him that you need “time” to think about what you want in this relationship, because you are currently involved in a completely unsatisfying one. You will know where you stand by his reaction and response.

 

  • Plan a nice night together; take time to talk and ask him if he would be willing to make some changes to bring the relationship back to center. If he is concerned and open to the changes, then you have a shot. If he becomes defensive, confrontational or indifferent, it may be time to move on. Don’t waste time with someone who does not want to make the effort to be reconnected to you.

 

And, if you have a question, ask Matt:   http://www.matttitus.com/contact/

Follow Matt On Twitter: @MattTitus

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Ask Matt Titus: When is he going to take down his Dating Profiles?

Ask Matt Titus: When is he going to take down his Dating Profiles?

Dear Matt,

We’ve had a few dates and it’s always a good time. The problem is, he still has his profile up on two online dating websites? Can I ask him to take it down?

 

Matt Titus Says: 

The goal here is for him to actively take down his profile on his own without you asking, hinting or requesting him to do so. If he does this on his own, it will make you feel extremely secure in the relationship. Give him at least 2 months before you even bring it up. Here are some ways to deal with it in the meantime.

Don’t dwell on it. Does it really matter that his profile is up when you guys have a great time every time you get together?

Where’s your confidence? Remember, a confident girl is a sexy girl. Just relax. It’s a little early for you to even be thinking about him taking down his profile. Let him have at it!

Let him continue to meet women that absolutely pale in comparison to you. He’ll figure out soon enough that he only wants to be with you!

 

And, if you have a question, ask Matt at  http://www.matttitus.com/contact/

Follow Matt on Twitter: @matttitus

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Ask Matt Titus: How to make the morning after less awkward


couple in bed Matchmaker Matt Titus answers your dating and relationship questions

Dear Matt,

I finally spent the night over at the guy’s apartment I’ve been seeing and everything went REALLY well. But the next morning, the conversation was weird. Any advice to avoid the awkward sleepovers the morning after?

Matt Titus Says:

The sun comes up and suddenly it’s all clear. He sees your bed head and you notice his place isn’t quite as cool as it looked at 1am.
The next morning after the first sleepover can be awkward no matter how relaxed and confident both people are.
Here are a few things that might keep the sleepovers as simple as the night before.

  • Don’t feel the need to have a witty conversation ready and waiting.
  • Keep it low key. You don’t have to have plans for the next rendezvous before you leave.
  • Exit gracefully. Just because you spent the night together, it doesn’t mean he wants to see you for the next 8 hours. 
  • Let him miss you when you leave and LET HIM CALL YOU before you return.

And, if you have a question, ask Matt at http://www.matttitus.com/contact/

Follow Matt On Twitter: @MattTitus

 

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Ask Matt Titus: Can I send a guy flowers?

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Matchmaker Matt Titus answers your dating and relationship questions

Dear Matt:

 Is there something wrong with sending a guy flowers?

I did it after a second date to say thank you, and I haven’t heard from him since.

 

Matt Titus Says:

The best thing that you could send a guy after a great second date is…NOTHING. Men do not respond well to gestures like flowers.

Most likely, that bouquet  will be interpreted by him as a symbol that you think that the relationship is more serious than it really is… and he will withdraw.

A 3-step plan to make sure you get a third date.

  1. Do nothing. Wait for him to make the next move
  2. Make him wait. Don’t agree to go out immediately. This is what separates the girls from the women. Tell him you must check your calendar and get back to him (especially if he waits more than 4 days to call you).
  3. Do NOT obsess. Remember, you have only gone out with him twice. Anybody can be on his or her best behavior for two dates. Stay busy, spend time with friends, workout and never, ever practice putting his last name after yours!

 

And, if you have a question, ask Matt: http://www.matttitus.com/contact/

Follow Matt On Twitter: @MattTitus

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Ask Matt Titus: Do I Tell Him About My Past?

Ask Matt Titus:  Do I Tell Him About My Past?

Matchmaker Matt Titus answers your questions about love, dating and relationships

Dear Matt,
I am bold, very open and always honest about my sexual past with boyfriends. But, with the guy I am currently seeing, I am a little reluctant to tell him about my past. Any help you can give me? I don’t want to mess things up and I am sure I am not the only woman facing this problem.

Matt Titus Answers: Any man who has a problem with an experienced and mature woman, who knows exactly what she wants, needs to stay in HIS white picket fence fantasy world. There is nothing wrong with making mistakes and picking men who were not right for you in the past. The good news is, you know what you are looking for and what is right for you, now. Here are a few ways to ensure your former flings don’t come back to haunt you.

* Avoid bragging about the days you were what you call a “party girl.” It may sound hot to your girlfriends, but it probably doesn’t sound cool to him.

* Your relationship is not a confessional. It is okay NOT to reveal everything about yourself; a little mystery goes a long way.

* If you run into an old flame, introduce him, and make sure your boyfriend has the center spotlight. Don’t spend your Saturday night making excuses, explaining every intimate detail of this particular past tryst.

And, if you have a question, ask Matt Titus at http://www.MattTitus.com

Follow Matt On Twitter: @MattTitus

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